1.31.2011

A Prayer for a Friend Doubting the Faith



I've never used the "share this" option for Blogger before...we'll see how this works. :)


I often link to Scotty Smith's "Heavenward" posts on Facebook...his prayers so often resonate with me, and he is one of those lyrically beautiful writers whose wordcraft I work hard not to covet. I really felt today's post merited more than Facebook's pesky character limit would allow. :)

A Prayer for a Friend Doubting the Faith


This post took me back to a time when I was the one, as Scotty Smith describes it, "with a bull's eye painted on [my] chest." Never would I have expected to be in that position..."beyond anger"...feeling abandoned by God...being sucked in by Satan's twisting, undermining, and sabotaging. I had been taught the foundational truths of "Jesus loves you" and "God is good" since cradle roll and had been a firm believer in God's sovereignty from the time I first understood the word. Suddenly, I found myself doubting God's goodness, and the thought of His sovereignty brought anger instead of comfort.


It was a mercifully short period, marked by intense wrestling with God over these and other issues. At the time, only a few friends (and my husband) knew about the struggles...and even they didn't know all that was going on in my heart at the time. Oh, how I hated that they were having to slog through such a pit alongside me...but oh, how thankful I was and am that they groaned and grappled and "stay[ed] present in [my] chaos".


I am so thankful for friends who didn't run {screaming!} the other way, but who pursued me in those dark days. I am even more thankful for the God who not only caused them to pursue me, but who pursued me Himself in His amazing love and grace. I am ever-so-thankful for joy tenderly and mercifully restored. And I pray that God will give me the grace and boldness to be a grappling, groaning, pursuing, present-in-chaos friend to those who are wrestling with bull's eyes on their chests...today, next week, and always...



3 comments:

Angelia Williams said...

Jennifer,
I SERIOUSLY could have written this myself. I know it was hard, so thank you for sharing.
Love your blog!
angelia

Angelia Williams said...

If you would like to read a similar post I wrote... :)

http://deut66alongtheway.blogspot.com/2010/12/woman-stuff.html

angelia

Jennifer said...

Thanks, Angelia! I appreciate your words. I really enjoy your blog, as well...just posted a comment on the link you posted. :)