Do YOU Get It? Six Ways You Can Get It and Help Others to As Well

All too often scripture is distorted in order to justify the blind embracing of those who have sexually victimized children. Though the interim pastor proudly states, “We are firm believers in the Bible”, he provides no scriptural basis for his “belief” that past offenses of a sex offender should be forgotten. He provides none because there is none. At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a “changed person” in Jesus. - See more at: http://boz.religionnews.com/2014/06/27/4-lessons-learn-church-just-doesnt-get/#sthash.AVsJlwxE.dpuf

Though the interim pastor proudly states, “We are firm believers in the Bible”, he provides no scriptural basis for his “belief” that past offenses of a sex offender should be forgotten. He provides none because there is none. At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a “changed person” in Jesus. - See more at: http://boz.religionnews.com/2014/06/27/4-lessons-learn-church-just-doesnt-get/#sthash.AVsJlwxE.dpuf

Though the interim pastor proudly states, “We are firm believers in the Bible”, he provides no scriptural basis for his “belief” that past offenses of a sex offender should be forgotten. He provides none because there is none. At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a “changed person” in Jesus. - See more at: http://boz.religionnews.com/2014/06/27/4-lessons-learn-church-just-doesnt-get/#sthash.AVsJlwxE.dpuf

Though the interim pastor proudly states, “We are firm believers in the Bible”, he provides no scriptural basis for his “belief” that past offenses of a sex offender should be forgotten. He provides none because there is none. At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a “changed person” in Jesus. - See more at: http://boz.religionnews.com/2014/06/27/4-lessons-learn-church-just-doesnt-get/#sthash.AVsJlwxE.dpuf

Though the interim pastor proudly states, “We are firm believers in the Bible”, he provides no scriptural basis for his “belief” that past offenses of a sex offender should be forgotten. He provides none because there is none. At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a “changed person” in Jesus. - See more at: http://boz.religionnews.com/2014/06/27/4-lessons-learn-church-just-doesnt-get/#sthash.AVsJlwxE.dpuf

At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a “changed person” in Jesus. - See more at: http://boz.religionnews.com/2014/06/27/4-lessons-learn-church-just-doesnt-get/#sthash.AVsJlwxE.dpuf

At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a “changed person” in Jesus. - See more at: http://boz.religionnews.com/2014/06/27/4-lessons-learn-church-just-doesnt-get/#sthash.AVsJlwxE.dpuf

. At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a “changed person” in Jesus. - See more at: http://boz.religionnews.com/2014/06/27/4-lessons-learn-church-just-doesnt-get/#sthash.LM1EL3ml.dpuf

. At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a “changed person” in Jesus. - See more at: http://boz.religionnews.com/2014/06/27/4-lessons-learn-church-just-doesnt-get/#sthash.LM1EL3ml.dpuf

. At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a “changed person” in Jesus. - See more at: http://boz.religionnews.com/2014/06/27/4-lessons-learn-church-just-doesnt-get/#sthash.LM1EL3ml.dpuf

"At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a 'changed person' in Jesus. Even if that were true, Christians must understand the fundamental difference between an offender’s changed position before God and the fact he/she is still the same person who committed an abhorrent offense against a child that comes with lifetime consequences."

~ Boz Tchividjian

Yes, yes, a thousand times yes! I know I've posted on this subject very recently, but Boz Tchividjian's article 4 Lessons We Can Learn From a Church That Hired a Sex Offender demanded to be shared today.

I've had conversations with two different people this week about this very thing. The "lessons" in the above article are SO important.  PLEASE, if you are involved with the church and/or children in any way, shape, or form, PLEASE click over and read this article even if you've never clicked on a link I've shared before and you never intend to again.  It's that important. 

But What About Forgiveness?

As I said recently on my blog, we must "[r]ealize that forgiveness and restoration do NOT equal 'everything going back to the way it was before'.  Even when a perpetrator expresses true repentance, that does NOT mean that contact with the victim or victims is in any way appropriate.  In rare instances it may be, but generally only after much time and healing have occurred.  Victims (particularly child victims) and their families should not be expected to have contact with the perpetrator, even (or especially) in the setting of the church." 

And I didn't add there, but I've said it elsewhere...NEVER, EVER, EVER should a person with a history of child sexual abuse (which would include those involved in child pornography) be put in a position to have access to children. EVER. Some sins have lifelong consequences, even when true repentance and forgiveness have occurred.

Another thing I didn't add in that article, but which I've also said elsewhere: If a perpetrator is really, truly, sincerely repentant, they won't ask or expect to be put in a position with access to children.  I firmly believe that God can change hearts and lives even of perpetrators.  I also firmly believe that part of that change in this type of perpetrator is a willingness to never again be put in a position where they could harm a child.  We are all capable of falling back into sins for which we've confessed and for which we've been forgiven.  In this particular situation, the risk is too great.  It is protection for both the past offender and the potential victims.

Moving in the Right Direction, but Still Not There

I am thankful to know pastors and church members who do "get it".  I am thankful for those God has put in our lives who get it.  Those who get it are definitely out there, and I am thankful that their numbers are growing.  But many, many in church leadership and the church as a whole still don't.

What Can We Do?

How can you help?

1.Be educated. "Get it" yourself.  I've posted several articles here on the blog with resources to get you started. Child Protection Resources and Understanding in the Unthinkable: A Call to Action for the Body of Christ both contain links to excellent resources.

2. Be involved. Know your church's policies and procedures in the area of child protection, and make sure they are being followed.  If there aren't appropriate policies and procedures in place, initiate conversation with your pastor and church leadership about instituting some.

3. Be aware. No one wants to think about child sexual abuse.  We would all rather put it out of sight and out of mind.  But we simply can't afford to do that. We must be aware that there is no way to identify a perpetrator by sight.  This article contains several links to articles about protecting children from abuse and identifying offenders.

Also be aware that while tools like background checks, security systems, etc. are helpful, they are just that--tools. They can provide a false sense of security that can lead to devastating consequences.  Background checks only identify perpetrators who have been caught and convicted. Investigations...particularly child pornography investigations...can take years.  And perpetrators often have many victims before being caught.  Don't allow the fact that security measures are in place keep you from appropriately supervising and protecting your child/children.

4. Be a voice. Share this post, and Boz Tchividjian's post linked above, via social media. 
Speak up when topics related to child protection arise. Make sure your children have age-appropriate information about safety issues, and particularly make sure they know that ANY time anyone tells them to keep a secret from mom and dad, they are to immediately come and tell you. (The exception to this in our home is a parent or siblings planning a surprise for  mom and/or dad.  Anything else is to be spilled asap.)

5. Be in prayer. Pray for your church leadership regularly and faithfully.  This is a given regardless, but so often they are dealing with issues in the church that we are completely and blissfully unaware of.  Pray for wisdom and courage and compassion for them as they deal with these situations.

Pray for families in the church who are dealing with this type of trauma.  You may think you don't know any families in this situation.  I will almost guarantee you that unless you are a total hermit, you probably do...you just aren't aware of it.  We don't have to know names or details to pray.  God knows who they are. 

6. Be ready to minister.

 "This is such a huge area of need in our churches...ministry to children and families touched by abuse.  There are many more families dealing with this than we sometimes realize, in many different ways: families in which one or more children have experienced abuse, adults who experienced abuse as children, families who are fostering or have adopted children who experienced abuse in their family of origin, and others."

 ~From Awareness to Understanding to Ministry

The articles Understanding in the Unthinkable and  From Awareness to Understanding to Ministry both contain information to help the church minister to families who have been devastated by abuse.


Do you get it?  Will you spread the word and help others get it as well?

Today was supposed to be Fitness Friday here at the blog, but I felt this post took precedence. Besides, our week has been crazy and I've not known what day it was all week, so it's only appropriate that the days should be topsy turvy on the blog as well!  I'm planning to post "Fitness Friday on Saturday" tomorrow, and hopefully next week I'll be able to keep my days straight here and IRL. :) 

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Suggestions? Questions? Other thoughts? I'd love to hear any feedback you might have on this post either in the comments here or on Facebook, or via the comment box in the sidebar. 
 

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Welcome to Ponderings of an Elect Exile!  Whether you are new here or a faithful friend and regular reader, I'm glad you're here!  If you aren't already following, I'd love to have you join us for the 2014 Ponderings.  It's easy to do, in a variety of ways!  You can follow via  Facebook, Twitter, and/or Pinterest, or  find me on Instagram as Jenbh68. You can also sign up in the sidebar to receive new posts by email.  

All too often scripture is distorted in order to justify the blind embracing of those who have sexually victimized children. Though the interim pastor proudly states, “We are firm believers in the Bible”, he provides no scriptural basis for his “belief” that past offenses of a sex offender should be forgotten. He provides none because there is none. At the time this offender arrived at the church, many obviously believed his words that he was a “changed person” in Jesus. - See more at: http://boz.religionnews.com/2014/06/27/4-lessons-learn-church-just-doesnt-get/#sthash.AVsJlwxE.dpuf